Thursday, May 25, 2006

broke down n cried in sch today. its really hard. but today was slightly better. [to bernie: thank you.] [to the rest: i'm sorry if the things i did or said affected ur in anyway. i seriously didn't mean it. if i had a chance, i wld wanna relive tis couple of wks n correct all tt wld hv been inappropriate. i wan us to be frens n not juz simply "classmates".]

today had econs test. i tink it was alright.. but kinda skeptical if i can score. coz my ans dun tally wif anyone. so its kinda freaking me out. haiz.. then rushed down to jalan besar in a cab coz anee said mj was leading 1-0 at half-time.

got stuck in a jam n only reached in time to hear the terrible news. mj lost 4-2 to vj. no more champs. but runner-up is not bad. tis proves miracles do happen. vj scored 3 goals in the last 5min. how tyco can tt be. furthermore, the referee kayu. wtf.

anyway, the mj crowd was really gd. girls cried, the soccer boys looked crest-fallen n i swear i saw jon ma wipe away tears. but when we did mj cheers n sang the sch song, somehow i felt bonded. w/o the familiar uniform n heavy sch bag, i still felt tt i belonged. the unity was there. we stayed wif the boys even though they lost while the vj ppl were already leaving their champions. anyway, ms lai was nice enough to still give them a hol. i oso wan!! =(

met so many ppl. ppl tt i'm not even close too. n they welcomed me wif screams n opened arms. for the first time tis wk, i felt loved n wanted. so much so tt i teared again. i'm such a cry-baby. [to my darling earth: thanks for the big bear hug. i missed the times we shared.]

amanda . joyce . desmond . yuvan . jolene . phoebe . grace . yingjie . renfeng . magdeline . jeremy . sandy . manuel . jeevan . clement . suting . xuanqi . anee . michelle . teckpeng . horace . isabel . kavitha . derrick . samuel . tobias .

walked all the way frm the stadium to bugis for dinner. i saw my tennis guy wif a whole load of mj ppl. but sadly, he didn't recognise me. but is there a possibility tt he's a mj-dropout too?? haha. *hopeful*

had dinner at bk n got mistaken as trix by one of her frens. oh puh-lese. then took the long long bus ride hm juz to chat wif the peeps. n drooled at mj's resident cuties. the standard tt is sooo not found in sp. lol.

clement asked: why did u come back?
my reply: i juz felt tt i had to be here.
clement: but we still lost.
me: its the spirit tt counts.

tt left me wondering. if i had stayed. wat wld my life be like now? haha. i prob wun be here making fake ipods out of cardboard. instead, i'll be mugging like hell n be the one (not renfeng) tt is getting "targeted" by mr chua.

but tis is my choice. i'll stick wif it. i can. i will. i must.

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY TO:
suting and nicholas.
may u guys hv the best in everything u do n be loved always.